Thursday, December 16, 2010

Be THE GIVER

A man was washing his new car when his neighbor asked him, "When did you get the car?" He replied "My brother gave it to me." The neighbor said, "I wish I had a car like that". The man replied, "You should wish you have a brother like that." The neighbor's wife was listening to the conversation and she interrupted. "I wish I was a brother like that."


A very short story to reflect on. Among the three persons, the man who wishes he had a car like his neighbors - this trait we see in all of us, we all wish for something luxurious that our neighbor have, we all continue to be attached to the world of materialism, and this is not what I want to focus on. Rather I would like to talk about the other two persons in this story - the man who receives the new car from his brother who we can identify as "The TAKER / The RECEIVER" and the other is - the lady, who wishes that she could be like the brother who gifted the car - she we can identify as "The GIVER".

Ask yourself, in how many situations would you rather be a TAKER or a GIVER. And you'll see the scales tipping substantially to be a TAKER.

I feel guilty asking this question myself, how many times I wish I only received... right from my childhood till date... when I had relatives / friends returning for a vacation from a foreign country... my expectations of receiving something was always high... "Has he/she bought anything for me...?" Having not left, even my immediate family (my father or my brother)... Again this feeling in not neccessarily restricted only to something material or tangible.... it could be other intangibles like - understanding, personal time, sympathy, love.... And we see this expectation in different facets / different people - of life... our parents, our spouse, our children, our friends, our employer, our government and it goes on.... we always want to be only on the receiving end, of something GOOD.

Just imagine if all of us thought this way... of only wanting to RECEIVE... This world would have been a dead place to live in...

Fortunately... the silver lining to my message is that we all have the ability of being "The GIVER"... and at some point in our life we have already and defintely given and also FELT the JOY of GIVING. But the fact being, most of us had to be put in a situation of giving or an act of charity because of either, a favour we have already received... maybe a good job, improved finances, a life-partner, blessed with a child, recovery from an illness... OR maybe we did our acts of good deed in anticipation of a favour or blessing yet to come...

So the question is.... does the ACT of GIVING always have to be for a favour received OR a for favour yet to come ?

The answer is a big 'NO'. We have to be GIVERS for FREE...! This would be most difficult to practise for a writing preacher like myself... whose wallet always seems to be stuck in the trouser or left at home (lol)... but I'm surely working towards it. We can take our inspiration from human beings who have been blessed as perpetual GIVERS in our lives... one of my MOST ADORED being MOTHER TERESA. I don't need to ellaborate on her life.

Yet again knowing the hedonistic lifestyle we pursue, we dont neccessarily need to benchmark ourselves to be 'larger-than-life' GIVERS, we just need to practise tiny deeds of charity to experience this WARMTH and JOY of GIVING.

I conclude my article with a quote from Swami Vivekananda...
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Do not stand on a high pedestal and take 5 cents in your hand and say, "here, my poor man",... but be grateful that the poor man is there, so by making a gift to him you are able to help yourself. It is not the reciever that is blessed, but it is THE GIVER. Be thankful that you are allowed to exercise your power of benevolence and mercy in the world, and thus become pure and perfect.
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Wishing all of you'll a MERRY CHRISTMAS and BLESSED 2011...!

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